Accusing Dr Sharon of overcharging is rich coming from Ted,who spends his salaried days planning a sandwich-exchange program,playing keepie-uppies with waste paper and riding on the groundskeeper’s mower. It’s all part of his folksy entitlement. But any minute that she,a healthcare worker,spends not visibly tending to his needs is not valid as work at all.
Ted’s stingy attitude is the same one that GPs,in particular female GPs,receive from governments,some patients,and even our own colleagues. General practice,chronically underfunded,is the women’s work of medicine and women in general practice are the most womanly of all.Research consistently shows that female GPs earn less than male. More accurately,they do more unpaid work.
Female GPs interrupt less andmanage more issues per consultation – the medical equivalent of a mother juggling household obligations,work and everyone’s dental appointments and emotional wellbeing. Of course,there are compassionate,courageous male doctors who don’t duck the difficult,unrewarded medicine,and female doctors who do. My GP is a man and the most intuitive listener I’ve ever met.
But Ted and Sharon’s dynamic is probably familiar to anyone who works in the “helping” professions. (The name is a social phenomenon in itself. What job should exist that doesn’t help?) Sharon sees that Ted is suffering,but he declines her offers of help until he decompensates in her office in a midnight panic attack. It’s cathartic and groundbreaking to see a powerful man seek help with his mental health,but why do we accept his undervaluing of the woman providing it?
Ted usually places a premium on politeness but calls Sharon’s work “bullshit” and berates her for expecting him to “spill my guts about the gory details of my life”,despite the fact he came to her in desperation. He accuses her of not knowing him well enough;essentially,not mothering him enough. “You scared me,Ted,” she says. He doesn’t respond,and lashes out at her as punishment for not being a willing receptacle for his unprocessed pain. He expects her to be available to him in a form that is unconditional,non-threatening and underpaid.